The last 2+ years at Bain I have spent thinking almost exclusively about how individuals and organizations deal with change. If there is anything that work has taught me, it is that uncertainty about the future causes disruption - significant disruption in most instances. So much that it's often hard to get on with the normal course of business because the hours are filled wondering what's next? how will this impact me? how will this change my life? As I reflect on the almost 4 weeks we have now spent in the NICU with Peter, I can't help but draw on some of the parallels. The challenge James and I face is the question, when will we have some certainty so we can move forward from here? Unfortunately, the answer for the type of HIE injury that Peter sustained is likely not for a long time. When the brain is concerned, the doctors simply don't know what the future holds for him. We have been presented with a range of outcomes from Peter will grow to be a completely normal boy to he might not survive until his first birthday. The lack of certainty has us reeling. We can't help but ask the doctors daily about probabilities and likelihoods. We are searching desparately for something to anchor to. But what I have come to realize over the last many weeks is that there is some hope in the uncertainty. With Peter, anything is possible and we have to continue to focus on all the positive strides he is making and envision a world where he has conquered this difficult beginning. It's a tough battle but we know he is a fighter and his brain is continuing to work in overdrive to make it back. We have now been at Duke about 4 days and have definitely felt the love from the many pediatric speciality groups that have paid us visits from across the hospital. Sometimes it feels like a revolving door, but we have to be thankful that there are so many great minds trying to help him. In terms of status, here is the latest we have observed:
So there are some bright spots to celebrate. Still no idea when we will be able to bring him home but we are trying to remain patient. The lingering repiratory issues are likely what will keep us there for awhile so continuing to pray that he gets over those soon. Still 6 days left til his official due date of July 4th... |
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